ANY THING CAN GO WRONG
INCLUDING
MURPHY’S LAWS
Who is the originator of Murphy’s Laws - is Uncertain. But, many people , who do not want to give any credit to Murphy, whichever Murphy he may be, affirm that the laws were always there. They are nothing new. When the universe was built, every atom of it was infused with Murphy’s Laws. Forget Murphy – they are universal laws obeyed from sub atomic particles to huge galaxies. There wasn’t any one who did not know these laws – in some rudimentary form. All the people in the world were always using it consciously and unconsciously in their lives.
Admitting all these contentions - there is no denying the fact that - after these Laws came out in a simple format and called Murphy’s Laws, luck turned hugely in their favour and they came to be used more popularly and more consciously in all branches of human effort.
There is actually a single law – but it has many avatars; many shapes; many heads. It is almost a Hilarious truth – a some what comic representation of life.
We all know that change is the only constant in this universe. Things change. Every thing changes – every moment. If you try to change them, they will. If you don’t try to change them, then also, they will. So, change cannot be averted. But, the direction of change can be altered by our effort. We also change – in a natural, sequential process and to an extent, by our own effort.
But, there is not one man who is acting on changing things. There are billions of us all over the earth acting simultaneously – and in different directions, with different intentions. And then, nature itself is the biggest change Agent.
If all men suddenly go to sleep and do nothing for a week, the world will still change a lot. So – things change constantly by the effort of billions of people and also Nature (which includes space, air, fire, sun, moon, earth, seas, animals, birds, insects, viruses, bacteria and every thing seen and unseen).A one hour rain brings forth lots of changes in the atmosphere around us. All this means – that the whole universe is full of change agents – who are changing themselves and the entire environment around them constantly.
Now, Can we predict what will happen tomorrow or ten days from Now? If every thing is predictable, you would not be having news papers and news channels. When diverse forces act in different directions – the final outcome is bound to be somewhat unpredictable.
And yet, we, as human beings, try to predict, anticipate, forecast, plan, guess, foretell, map and do many, many things to bring a bit of clarity to our FUTURE. This is the specialty of human beings – amongst all other creatures.
As human beings – we predict the future – much more than any other animal can. Prediction also implies preparing for future. Prediction involves planning and channelizing things and events in desired directions.
We fix Goals – tomorrow’s goals, next Sunday’s goals, next year’s goals, next five years goals and so on. We know that without setting goals – we will never achieve much in life. Some one wants a gold medal in next Olympics. Some one wants to find a remedy for an illness. Somebody wants to build a huge monument. Some body wants to kill an enemy. There are more goals than there are people.
Even those who have no goals have expectations. Goals are planned expectations. But, there are expectations for which we have not planned.
We expect a rain tomorrow. We expect the train to come on time. We expect the Post office to open at 10 AM. We expect the ATM and our debit card also to work. We expect that the hotelier is not planning to poison all the people in the town who take food in his hotel. We expect the Pilot of our plane to be not dead drunk. We expect public servants to be helping people. We expect love from our spouse, children and parents. These are all implicit, underlying expectations in our day to day life. There are thousands of such expectations – on the basis of which we run our life.
We expect the air to be clean and containing sufficient oxygen and not containing toxic gases. We expect water to be clean. We expect our food to be nutritious and healthy. We expect our body to be reasonably healthy tomorrow. We expect that our country will not be attacked by terrorists tomorrow. We expect the pen in our pocket to have sufficient ink and actually write.
Suppose you start writing down all of your expectations; you will find that – your expectations go on filling pages after pages and yet, the expectations never seem to end. Murphy’s Law is precisely - on your expectations.
What happens again and again and again in our lives - with our expectations? Things go wrong. Our expectations go wrong. Things happen in unexpected ways. We are surprised, bewildered and dumbfounded – on why things happened the way they did – rather than the way we expected?
Why do things not happen in a predictable way? If not, what is likely to happen in various circumstances? What is the worst that can happen? What should we be prepared for?
These are certain aspects of life that are philosophically, artistically, creatively, critically, statistically, scientifically, socially, legally, sportively and seriously viewed and analyzed by wise men of all countries , and they have pronounced profound statements of Facts, near facts, subjective statements, objective statements, pessimistic statements, optimistic statements, realistic statements and out right non-sense statements – all of which are educative, leading and misleading to all of us.
If you add up your own experiences to these, you are the Murphy, who will pronounce your laws – for your benefit and possibly for the benefit of others. There were therefore many similar Murphys before us – and the field is wide open. If you don’t like the name Murphy, call it any other name. But, add to this cynical, clinical and umbilical wisdom.
The law initially was some thing like this. But, we will go on adding a few examples – just by way of illustrations.
1. If any thing can go wrong, it will.
2. Don’t be too sure that it will go wrong always. If you are sure, then, you have predicted correctly – and proved Murphy wrong. Things can go wrong. Not that they will. They may, or they may not.
3. Some times, you may tend to hope that things should go wrong. Like – you may wish that the train must come late today. It may. Or, it may not. But, when it does, usually, you were not expecting it at that time.
4. Some times you don’t want it to go wrong. Suppose – you are now made responsible to ensure that it doesn’t go wrong. But, you find, it goes wrong today – whatever you do.
5. It hasn’t gone wrong till yesterday, or even this morning. But, it can go wrong AFTER you assumed charge! And, therefore, it may become your fault. Everybody knows that you have taken charge today morning – and therefore, it is your fault.
6. Many things can go wrong simultaneously. You assumed charge today in the factory – and some thing big has gone wrong immediately. It is therefore your fault and your negligence and everybody understands it to be so.
7. If you attempt a cover-up, You will be found out. If you don’t – anyway, it is taken as your fault. Any cover-up by you becomes evidence that the earlier goof-up in the factory was actually your fault.
8. When you are tackling these serious issues – you may get a phone call – that your wife has slipped in the bath room and broken a few bones – and is in the hospital. If you go – you are damned in the factory by your bosses. But, if you don’t go, you are damned at home.
9. Why did she slip in the bath room? You have not washed off the soap water that got sprinkled all over the Bath room, after your taking bath for half an hour. It was slippery – and you didn’t clean or warn your wife. She slipped, broke a few bones – and it was your fault. She knows it too and is mad at you.
10. Well. You are between the devil and the deep sea and can’t help things either way now. Hospital or Factory? Divorce or dismissal? What is the maximum punishment that will come? Your head is cursing your fate. Cursing Murphy.
11. Well. You open your Brief case and take out a kerchief to wipe the sweat off your face. Your daughter’s school note book stares you in the face. You wrote her home work last night lovingly – when she was asleep. But, the note book is now in your Brief case. Will you rush to the school to make over the Note Book to your Daughter? Or allow her to take punishment from the teacher? It was your goof-up. Your daughter knows it.
12. Any thing can go wrong. Many things can go wrong. Simultaneously. When you see a small cloud – it may pass, it may drizzle or it may rain, but if Murphy’s law is at work, a huge tornado may be coming your way.
13. You take a chance. Tell some one in the factory that you will be back in half an hour, after seeing your wife and daughter. You tell your boss too. Now, you get into your car and drive fast. You had serviced you car, just yesterday. It can’t fail you too. It can’t go wrong. But,…. it can. Murphy is always at work.
14. Somebody has just thrown a long nail on the road and your tyre hits it and the nail just gets into it somehow. It is now punctured. You are on the Roads.
15. If this doesn’t happen, Some one’s car can hit you from behind. You are not the only one on the road. Other people have their emergencies too. Their cars were not serviced yesterday. So, now, you are neither at the factory, nor at the Hospital nor at the school.
16. You can predict four things to be taken care off. But, the fifth thing comes out laughingly, and stares at you when you are least prepared for it. You can’t fix all faults. The fault you didn’t fix – is waiting to become the main culprit.
17. The strongest iron tubes and girders in the world trade centre from its bottom to the top were finally - said to be responsible that the centre collapsed totally. The Engineering Marvel – overlooked the hundredth fault probably – and the hundredth fault was waiting in the wings to come out and laugh at all. Did we ever prepare for it?
18. The unfixed fault is known when things actually go wrong. But, there is always an unfixed fault in every thing in our life. Not just one. Many.
19. What is depreciation? It is the coming down of the value of a thing, due to its use or even due to its non-use. Use it. The thing will be gone after some time. Don’t use it. Then also it is gone after some time.
20. Whether you make a machine, or mother nature makes a tree or a human being – all will go – no matter what you do – after some time. That’s law of depreciation simplified.
21. If you use more – either the machine or your self – they will go more quickly. Things become worse under pressure.
22. So what happens? What is the definite prediction for tomorrow?
23. Tomorrow, things will get worse. Whatever you do. Law of depreciation at work.
24. So Smile. Today is a better day than tomorrow. That is reason enough to celebrate.
25. Let us look at life a little more closely. What do we really want? We want to be healthy. We want to be happy.
26. We want a beautiful wife or a rich, handsome husband. We want them to be loyal to us. We want them to be very versatile. We want them to take care of us. We want them to be great cooks; great talkers; great earners; great artists. great lovers. But, loyal to us. Even if we aspire for two or three only of these qualities – things start going wrong with the spouse. It is Murphy at work.
27. When we love them and they love us - things look great. But, marry them, as some time you will; and you instantly realize, things are not as great as they looked. They start becoming ordinary from next morning. They become very ordinary in a week, and then very, very ordinary in a month, and then very stupid too in a year. Some may find it unbearable later some time.
28. It is a passage from “can’t live without” to a more earthly “can’t live with” sort of realization. People change. Love also changes. It has happened to countless people. But, you expected your love to be immortal, immutable, eternal. It changes. You change. Your spouse changes.
29. Why do things change always? Because, they are not right – right now. They have to change. They will. Which way? Try to predict and go on fixing the faults. The fifth unfixed fault will slip you when the slope then is very slippery.
30. Can you ensure that there is no mad man or mad woman in New York or New Delhi? No way.
31. You may not know right now – but one day, your spouse may look like one, to you. Or, you may look like one to your spouse. Murphy at work – replacing the cupid, stupid!
32. Doctors make mistakes – just 1% of the time. Be grateful to them. But, if there are 100 Doctors in the town, at least one of them is making a mistake right now. Over a period of time, they make 100 mistakes – one per Doctor. Over a longer period, they make 1,000,000 mistakes. Are you sure, you will escape this 1,000,000 mistakes? Well. It is possible if you don’t go to any doctor.
33. Things go wrong to different people in different ways. There are bacteria and viruses which are very freely getting into and out of your body all the time. Health is the period between every 2 sicknesses. That is the reason your medical leave is a reasonable number of days in every year. You are expected to fall sick every year – for say, 20 days!
34. We visit Doctors of different specialties periodically, including the psychiatrists for the mind and the psycho-somatic things. There is a specialist for every part of your body and mind. But - None of these Doctors have reasonable cures for most major, known, frequently attacking diseases. But they do tell you what has gone wrong with you and give you some predictions.
35. Whoever buys a house or builds one – is always running up and down the hardware shop, plumber’s shop, electrician’s shop, municipal authorities’ offices and so on. But, the one who rents a house – has to deal only with the owner of the house. Lesser hassles.
36. If you marry – you are in lot of problems. Things never work out to the approximation of a heaven – which you thought would fall into your lap. This continues till the D’Day – the divorce day. Upto 6 months before and 6 months after the d’day, you see hell. You decide – enough is enough. But, then the second and third marriages are also made in heaven, by the father in the heaven. You can’t help it. You will get into them. The cycle goes on.
37. In some countries like India, most couples stick to the same husband (or wife) – from the Marriage day to the Death day. They do fight. Things do go wrong in India too. But, they don’t change each other. Like we said earlier, the next husband or wife can be worse. The known devil is better than an unknown angel or devil .There is also the possibility, that the known devil may become the less and less of a devil as time goes on, running out of tricks and patience. They, in fact, start loving the Play.
38. Outside our home – in every field, we can see Murphy at work all the time.
39. Just one last example. Look at our Political Governance – in any country. Every Political Party is always in deep trouble. The ruling party is always in trouble. But, its consolation is – the opposition parties are in equal or deeper trouble. Consequently, the people are in the deepest trouble.
40. Booms and depressions happen in cycles. We know the depression when it is with us. Not before. Do whatever – like some infectious diseases, it stays for a certain number of years. Some countries are in depression perennially. Things are always going wrong there.
41. Every coin has another side. Murphy is not an exception. Let us look at the other side.
42. The problem with us is – most of the time, we don’t know the problem or where it is. The ancient Indian sciences say philosophically that – it is not the world that is the problem – it is YOU, dammit.
43. YOU are the problem all the time.
44. You think, your spouse is the problem. No, it is you. You think, the government is the problem. No, its you. You think, the car is the problem. No. its you. It is always You – who don’t know either the problem or the solution.
45. You are the Murphy – who goes wrong all the time – and is blaming all the universe for it.
46. You don’t know what to eat, when to eat, why to eat, when to drink, why to drink, what to drink, whom to marry, why to marry, when to marry, whom to vote, whom not to vote, when to sleep, how long to sleep, where to sleep – small, small, small things, all these you don’t know. I don’t know either. Ask the President of any country – he or she doesn’t know either.
47. Murphy is wrong. Murphy is DEAD WRONG – in saying that – NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO, THINGS GO WRONG!
48. Things are going RIGHT – all the time. It is just that - we don’t know and don’t understand. If One car collides with another, iIt is perfectly natural and understandable that they smash each other and become rubble and rubbish. That is the right thing to happen.
49. If you abuse your spouse – he / she will get angry. That is the right thing to happen. If you feel attracted to some one else other than your spouse; well, a year down the line – divorce is on the cards. That is the right thing to happen. It is just that – we don’t know and don’t understand.
50. If there is a tension between two individuals, or two countries, that is the right thing to happen. Just that, they don’t understand. There is a carry forward from the past in both of them that creates the tension.
51. It is as simples as this. If you drink and drive – the possibilities of you getting into an accident are three time more than when you drive sane. Well. You are not the only one who decided to drink and drive. There are a hundred others who are also drunk and driving – and have therefore increased the chances of an accident to their car three times more than normal, for each of them. This means that the chances of your getting into an accident, when all of you drive on the same road are now around 3 x 100 = 300 times more than normal. If all of you drive on different roads, the chances are proportionately less. And you assume you are the only one to drink and drive! You are wrong. But, accidents are happening correctly – absolutely rightly. They are not going wrong.
52. For this reason, the Great Indian scripture Bhagavad Gita proclaims – whatever happened, was the right thing to happen. Whatever is happening is the right thing to happen. Whatever is going happen (any time in future) will be the right thing to happen.
53. So. Murphy’s Law is wrong – or right?
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