CRITICISM - CONSTRUCTIVE & DESTRUCTIVE -WHEN NOT TO CRITICISE - WHEN IS CRITICISM A MUST?

CRITICISM

There is this beautiful saying that - you can approach Life either as a creator or as A critic. 

If you approach life as a Creator - you are constantly busy, creating some thing new. You are criticizing your own work - as it proceeds and improving it. You are therefore left with very little time - for criticizing the work of others. Even if you do sometimes criticize - it will be like a teacher's advice to his disciple - and highly effective, constructive and  improving the work of the other person.

Your criticism -of your self and of your disciples - is not personal - but is limited to the assessment of the creative work. In the Half full - Half empty mindset - you are one who is always looking at the Half full side of the Glass. The Creator is a born optimist.

But, if you are one approaching life as a critic - the opposite becomes equally true. You are left with very little time for any creative effort. You are constantly looking for mistakes, blunders,  oddities, stupidities etc - in the creative works of others. Some times, your criticism may be constructive, criticizing the work of others for improvement. But, the very habit of being a constant critic, makes you criticize the person too - apart from his work most of the time. 

Yes. every creator needs a constructive critic - who first appreciates the Creator's work and its positive angles - and then points to the improvements that are possible in this work - and in the future works. Yet, the role of even a constructive critic - is secondary - in the society, compared to the Creator. Unless, the creator exists, the critic, even the constructive critic, is almost useless to the society. In the Half full - Half empty mindset - a constructive critic must constantly make conscious effort to look at the Half full side and also the Half empty side of the Glass. The constructive critic needs to constantly remind himself to be an Optimist.His optimism is - in the ability of the creator - whop can transform the society to the Better - but he himself feels incapable of such effort.

The worst of the 3 categories is the critic - who is not constructive.  In the Half full - Half empty mindset - this sort of critic is always seeing and is able to see only the Half empty side of the Glass. He is the ultimate pessimist. He has no suggestions to offer to the creator. But, he has plenty of things to find fault with - in the creator's work, and in the creator himself. 

From the time, he wakes up in the morning, each day of life sees him  criticizing all the people around him, all the systems around him and always feels that nothing in the world can become better. If some thing becomes better, some thing else has already become far worse. He feels neither he nor any others are capable of doing any thing positive for the world. The world is a bad place to live in. He wants others to listen to him - but has nothing positive to offer. His presence or his proximity is enough o drive others nuts. One must either shun his presence - or be very curt to stop him in spoiling the efforts and moods of others.

If you find a creator mindset in your proximity - or within you - go all out to encourage that mindset. We must go one step further in saying this. Each Individual must become a creator in some field of human endeavour. God has created us in his own Image exactly for this purpose. Fell God's hands and God's mind in you and attempt your creative effort. Wherever you find a creator - who is doing any positive work, and making a positive contribution to the society - encourage him in all possible ways.

But, of course, some constructive criticism is also essential. Otherwise there will be very little improvement. A parent must offer constructive criticism - to his children. A teacher must offer it to his students. Every citizen must offer constructive criticism to the leaders he elects to carry on the process of Governance. These, as you can see, are DUTIES - which are essential.

Unfortunately, today, children are becoming unwilling to take even constructive criticism of their parents and Teachers.

Political leaders are increasingly becoming incapable of accepting the constructive criticism of citizens. Constructive criticism will be in the form of praise when one does the right thing or good thing. But, it will be censure when one doesn't do the right thing, or, when one does the wrong thing.

We must learn to accept such constructive criticism - and offer it when it is due from us.

But, each of us must desist from destructive criticism - which is purposeless - which turns the other person into a negative mindset; which creates ill will and enmities in the society.

A Government or an Institution, working for public and customer benefit - must make extra efforts to seek criticism - and be prepared to receive both constructive and non-constructive criticism 

If this is understood - progress of the society and of the Individuals is - ASSURED. Our society will be a Great Place to live.

*  *  *   E  N  D  *  *  *

 

Great quotes from = Stephen R. Covey = Author of = "7 Habits of Highly Effectife People"

Great quotes from

Stephen R. Covey

Stephen R Covey is a renowned speaker-author and a specialist in personal success doctrine. His " 7 Habits of Highly effective people " has truly revolutionized the personal success literature and added LIFE to the lives of many aspirants of personal success. 

I love reading him, listening to him and looking up to some of his Great quotable quotes often.

Here are a few of them. The way I read them is – I read, re-read and  think where exactly it is applicable in my own personal life right now. I also examine their application in the lives of  the prominent personalities I know. 

To me, therefore,  - Each quote takes some time – before I can move to the next. I think, that is the effective way, anyone must read them. Take your time. Do not hurry through.

None of these are just beautiful quotes that you or I will need to tell others, to display our knowledge. They are of far greater consequence to us. They can change our life; our life style; Our capability to enjoy life; our capability to be more effective; our capability to love others. And Our capability to leave a legacy in this world.

Stephen may or may not be aware; but a good number of these are very close to what the Bhagavad Gita says – in various chapters, mainly the Karma Yoga chapter. After 5000 years – they are as relevant today, as they were then, and as they will always be. And, some are very close to what the Bible says. A few (like sl.15) are close to what the Buddha says.

Each of them is pulsating with life – with life’s success, that is – and each of them is not just a thought – each requires your ACTION.

Here are some of his (my) choice quotes :

1.   The way we see the problem is the problem.

2.   The first choice we make each and every day is, "Will we act upon life, or will we merely be acted upon?"

3.   The main thing is - to keep the main thing the main thing.

4.   Those who get the most out of life and those who give the most are those who make the choice to act.

5.   While we are free to choose our actions, we are not free to choose the consequences of our actions. Consequences are governed by natural law.

6.   While we cannot always choose what happens to us, we can choose our responses.

7.   People with a scarcity mentality think there is only so much in the world to go around. It's as if they see life as a pie. When another person gets a big piece, then they get less. Such people are always trying to get even, to pull others down to their level so they can get an equal or even bigger piece of the pie.

8.   Each of us tends to think we see things as they are, that we are objective. But this is not the case. We see the world, not as it is, but as we are - or, as we are conditioned to see it.

9.   True effectiveness is a function of two things: what is produced (the golden eggs) and the producing asset (the goose).

10.        As we make and keep commitments, even small commitments, we begin to establish an inner integrity that gives us the awareness of self-control and the courage and strength to accept more of the responsibility for our own lives. By making and keeping promises to ourselves and others, little by little, our honor becomes greater than our moods.

11.        To begin with the end in mind means to start with a clear understanding of your destination. It means to know where you're going so that you better understand where you are now and so that the steps you take are always in the right direction.

12.        It's incredibly easy to get caught up in an activity trap, in the busy-ness of life, to work harder and harder at climbing the ladder of success only to discover it's leaning against the wrong wall. It is possible to be busy - very busy - without being very effective.

13.        Whether we are aware of it or not, whether we are in control of it or not, there is a first creation to every part of our lives. We are either the second creation of our own proactive design, or we are the second creation of other people's agendas, of circumstances, or of past habits.

14.        A good affirmation has five basic ingredients: it's personal, it's positive, it's present tense, it's visual, and it's emotional.

15.        If you don't know yourself, if you don't control yourself, if you don't have mastery over yourself, it's very hard to like yourself, except in some short-term, psych-up, superficial way.

16.        Seek first to understand, then to be understood.

17.        Communication is the most important skill in life. We spend most of our waking hours communicating. But consider this: You've spent years learning how to read and write, years learning how to speak. But what about listening? What training or education have you had that enables you to listen so that you really, deeply understand another human being from that individual's own frame of reference?

18.        Principles are natural laws that are external to us and that ultimately control the consequences of our actions.

19.        The key is not to prioritize what's on your schedule, but to schedule your priorities.

20.        There are three constants in life... change, choice and principles.

21.        Accountability breeds response-ability.

22.        Basing our happiness on our ability to control everything is futile

23.        Between stimulus and response is our greatest power - the freedom to choose

24.        We are limited but we can push back the borders of our limitations

25.        Nothing is more exciting and bonding in relationships than creating together

26.        Interdependency follows independence.

27.        To touch the soul of another human being is to walk on holy ground.

28.        Trust is the glue of life. It's the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It's the foundational principle that holds all relationships.

29.        I am not a product of my circumstances. I am a product of my decisions.

30.        Most of us spend too much time on what is urgent and not enough time on what is important.

31.        The enemy of the “best” is often the “good.”

32.        Live, love, laugh, leave a legacy.

33.        Be a light, not a judge. Be a model, not a critic

34.        Without involvement, there is no commitment. Mark it down, asterisk it, circle it, underline it. No involvement, no commitment.

35.        Humility acknowledges that there are natural laws or principles that govern the universe. They are in charge. Pride teaches us that we are in charge. Humility teaches us to understand and live by principles, because they ultimately govern the consequences of our actions.

36.        When the trust account is high, communication is easy, instant, and effective.

37.        Happiness, like unhappiness, is a proactive choice.

38.        Proactive people focus their efforts in the Circle of Influence. They work on the things they can do something about

*  *  *   E  N  D  *  *  *